I'm grumpy today.
I just erased an entire diatribe on the disgusting eating habits of one of my children and how he is trying to make it my problem.
It wasn't making me feel any better to rehash it and I was only talking myself in circles as far as trying to make it his fault and not mine but acknowledging the fact that I didn't help matters by getting mad about it.
I actually started out my day great! Woke up at 5, prepped breakfast for the two kids who will actually eat what I make them (albeit, sometimes not without a face or three), made a cup of coffee and DRANK it while reading my latest issue of LiveHappy magazine. Seriously, there is such magazine, and I get it for free. It's working already!
Then I took two kids to the school bus and came home to the question of "can I make my popcorn for breakfast?" That absolutely derailed me, and at the risk of going into my rant again, can I pose the question here as to whether or not it is okay to allow kids to make crappy food choices so long as there are good ones available? Seriously, there is peanut butter and jelly (the peanut butter isn't sweet enough), bread, cheese, Spam (at his request), eggs, sausage, bananas, there was smoothie already mixed and in the blender, lunch meat, cereal (both hot and cold) and any number of combinations there of...and according to him there is nothing else worth eating but his theater-style, yellow lard-iced, salt-soaked, nasty-ass popcorn.
So I told him to pop it. I also told him he was an idiot.
Well, actually I told him that there was absolutely nothing in that entire bag of popcorn that made it a good choice. The only thing it had going for it at all was the whole grain, but that due to everything else in that bag, he would be just as well off eating the paper sack.
He cared not at all. He just glared at me.
Because it is my fault that he can't have frozen corn dogs for breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Honestly, at this point, I would love to stuff him with nothing but twinkies and hot dogs for a month except for the fact that (a) he probably wouldn't suffer and (b) CPS might get involved.
Crap, I just rewrote my whole negative rant again. And again, it hasn't made me feel any better to get it out. It just made me relive it. Okay, Katie. So fix it. How do I relive this in a positive light?
Well. He ate the damn popcorn and there is no more to bug me about tomorrow.
Yay! I win!
So on a totally unrelated note, I read in my magazine today that the positive effect that pets have on our health is so powerful that the chief cardiologist at one British hospital actually prescribes a dog for men who have just had a heart attack. As a result he has found that the chances of a second heart attack in these men are cut by 400 percent!!! Which leads me to wonder how absolutely horrible my life would be without Floki, and even the cats (who actually cause a good percentage of my stress on any given day). The amount of stress I can generate in a day by simply being me can be pretty disgustingly ginormous. I can't imagine how intolerable it would be if I didn't have at least one entity in my household who would come when I called without saying "just a sec" or else say "coming" only to arrive 10 minutes later...if at all, eat everything I give him gratefully, want to be in the same room as me without saying "I know!", "Can I?", or "Why not?", and not need much more other than about 15 minutes of my time either throwing a ball or sitting still so they can simply sit in my lap.
Why did I have kids again?
Probably so I can appreciate my pets more. I think I hear a Chuck-it calling my name.
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